In addition to latching onto weird music and fashion trends, I’ve picked up a few strange hobbies in my day.
Here are just a few of the things that I've devoted large amounts of time and money to...
POKEMON CARDS: All of the cool kids at the bus stop were into Pokemon, so I tried to be, too. I won a pack of cards at a birthday party and based all of my trading decisions off of how cute the Pokemon were. I had 16 Digletts by the end.
ANNE OF GREEN GABLES PHASE: This was not so much as a hobby as it was a lifestyle choice. I watched the Anne of Green Gables movies, which prompted me to read the books, which made me want to be more like Anne. So I wrote a few things in my journal about Gilbert Blythe and called my sister my “bosom buddy” for a week.
VOLLEYBALL: I went through a few different sports phases, but the one that made the least sense was my brief obsession with volleyball. I had never so much as touched a volleyball, but my girl scout troop got to meet the UNC Women’s Volleyball team. I went home with a poster that I promptly hung on my wall and a brand new dream: Become a professional volleyball star.
I picked the prettiest player on my poster, circled her face and stared at it every night as I fell asleep. I also checked out every library book I could find on how to play volleyball, but still never actually touched a volleyball. Three weeks later I replaced my poster with pictures of Avril Lavigne.
GLASS BLOWING: The hobby I never got to try. Inspired by a demonstration I’d seen on vacation in Seattle, I was prepared to change my career plans to become a professional glass blower.
I also bought, like, three magnets with mallard ducks on them, which isn’t important to the story, but shows you how fun I was.
GUITAR: I asked for a guitar for my birthday two years in a row. I’d already lost interest in learning how to play by the time I unwrapped one for Christmas.
This isn’t really an embarrassing hobby, but that guitar sat in my closet for years as a giant humiliating reminder that I gave up after twenty minutes. My sister uses it now, so my guilt has dissipated.
GARDEN GNOME COLLECTING: I wish I was kidding. (In case you were concerned, I have since divested myself of all but the original gnome.)
Make sure you store these up in your long-term memory so you can use them against me the next time I announce that “Scrapbooking/Stamp Collecting/Butter Sculpting is my new thing!”
And follow Girl, Interrupting on Facebook so you’ll be the first to know when I announce such a thing.