Laura

Jesus Wants me to Have Chocolate

Laura
Jesus Wants me to Have Chocolate

I’m not Catholic, so I don’t have to feel bad if I don’t give something up for Lent.

At least - this is what I tell myself year and year again when, 13 hours into giving up chocolate, I remember I had a chocolate frosted doughnut for breakfast. And that meant I didn’t have to pass on the girl scout cookies in the break room after all. Which, if we’re being honest, I turned down with a nonchalant “No thanks. Gave up chocolate for Lent!” and then secretly snuck back five minutes later to steal the box and inhale whatever was left. 

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My New Year’s Resolutions don’t often last through January, which is probably why the concept of Lent appeals to me. It’s sort of a do-over. If you already blew it on your yearlong goals, just try to behave yourself for 40 days.

In a religious context, Lent serves as a six-week preparation for Easter. It’s meant to be a period of time to focus on prayer, repentance of sins, and self-denial. (Do my delusions that “this time I’ll stick with it!” count as self-denial? I may be onto something here.)

Mardi Gras, also known as Fat Tuesday (conveniently, also my stripper name!) is a day of self-indulgence and celebration before the start of Lent. And, just like Jesus would have wanted, it’s one last chance before Easter to shake your boobs for beads. #FreetheNipple

It's on Mardi Gras that I feel optimistic, promising to quit chocolate until Easter arrives and envelopes me in sweet caramel with a candy coating. Other foolish and unrealistic things I said I was giving up after Mardi Gras include:

  • Homework
  • Facebook
  • Caffeine

This year, in the interest of keeping my New Year’s Resolution to post on my blog at least once a week, I’m going to give up binge-watching for Lent.

Yes - I'm breaking up with Netflix so I can stay with chocolate.

No more weekend benders plowing through half a season of Grey’s Anatomy and two Adam Sandler movies. No more coming home from work and watching The Office until I pass out. I’m limiting myself to one episode per day - freeing up lots of time to write new blog posts and fit other, more productive activities into my day.

Tune in later for a follow-up post, where I will be doing one or more of the following:

  • Ranting about how much I miss Netflix
  • Experiencing Catholic guilt for failing to give up Netflix
  • Patting myself on the back for not trying to give up chocolate again

What are you giving up for Lent? Tell me on the Girl, Interrupting Facebook page