My mother fed me delicious home-cooked meals for 18 years, only to watch me jump out of the nest and into a world filled with french fries and pre-packaged preservatives.
I have a full kitchen in my apartment that I have used to it's full capacity exactly twice since August. (Microwaving Lean Cuisines and heating up soup on the stove don't count.) It's not that I don't know how to cook. It's mostly that I have the schedule of a single mother working three jobs and the taste buds of a ten-year old.
So today I'm going to share my favorite recipe for my favorite home-cooked meal with you:
Serves: 1 Prep Time: 30 seconds Cook Time: 3 minutes
Ingredients: 1 Hot Pocket - Pretzel bread, if you know what's good for you.
- Lovingly select a Hot Pocket.
If you are like me, with two 12-pack boxes jammed in the freezer, you will have to isolate one from the herd. If you only bought the 2-pack, you probably know how to cook other, healthier things for dinner and this whole process will seem foolish to you.
- Tenderly unwrap the Hot Pocket.
- Make sure your Hot Pocket is safely secured in it’s special Microwave Crisping SleeveTM.
- Place delicately in the center of a microwave-safe plate, in the exact center of the microwave.
Don’t be afraid to pull out a measuring tape - accuracy is key.
- Blow your Hot Pocket one last kiss as you close the microwave door.
- Select 2:50 seconds on your microwave.
The box says “2:45,” but a true Hot Pocket aficionado knows that that’s not enough to raise the cheese temperature to molten liquid.
You've worked so hard for this.
- Devour it whole.
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